• nichtsowichtig@feddit.de
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    7 months ago

    I feel like the point is rather that instead of redefining masculinity into something more positive, we should rather deconstruct gender norms in general. Because regardless of masculinity being something “positive” or “negative”, it is still an expectation for people to live up to. And eventually people will fail to live up to them. That’s why I would say it is preferable to deconstuct gender as a whole, rather than redefining it.

    • Deceptichum@sh.itjust.works
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      7 months ago

      If the goal of the article is to promote agenderism, it goes about it poorly. From the tagline of

      It’s perfectly fine to be a “feminine” man. Young men do not need a vision of “positive masculinity.”

      Before leading into countless criticisms based purely on a far-right view of masculinity. It takes a rather hostile approach to many people’s identities and falsely attributes a perspective onto it that not everyone shares.


      While it would be interesting to live in a world without gender, it’s a very radical change. It would be more prudent to achieve the shorter timeframe goal of eliminating that harmful right wing conceptualisation in the meanwhile.

      Not to mention the morality, as we would effectively be erasing people’s experiences, as for many people they do identify as somewhere on a gender spectrum.

      Is it okay to say that’s wrong, and they shouldn’t? I don’t know, I can see the merit, but I can also see the oppression in dictating how others live and identify.

      There’s also a bit of a colonial attitude issue, can we say tell other cultures (ex. Indigenous) to stop their traditions around gender such as coming of age ceremonies?

      • nichtsowichtig@feddit.de
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        7 months ago

        While it would be interesting to live in a world without gender, it’s a very radical change.

        I don’t think that is necessary. What we should do is to detach gender from any form of judgement or expectation. There is this feminist, liberal idea of how a modern man should be like, act like, feel like - but at the end of the day it is still maintaining the concept that men have some sort of role to fulfill. That it is what bothers me about gender expectations: you are supposed to be in a certain way just because of the sex you were born with/the gender you appear to be. And no matter how you want to (re)define it, you’re always going to have people who won’t feel comfortable in these categories.

        There’s also a bit of a colonial attitude issue, can we say tell other cultures (ex. Indigenous) to stop their traditions around gender such as coming of age ceremonies?

        What exactly is the colonial attitude supposed to be? This discussion seems to focus on western ideas around gender?

      • nichtsowichtig@feddit.de
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        7 months ago

        first of all, I really apreciate your comment is thematically consistent with your username. checks out!

        it’s ok to be a man if it’s ok to be a woman.

        I never said otherwise! gender and identity is fine, and people should live and express themselves however they feel the happiest with.

        all you talk about is about dicks and vaginas

        I am specifically not doing that. gender is not tied to sex. I think you really miss my point here. I think that men should be free of any gender expectation. People should be able to identify themselves without having to meet any expectations imposed by society.

        as if one’s “gender” is ALL one’s personality

        I quite literally advocate for the opposite - gender does not (intrinsically) mean anything for one’s personality.