Ah.

I see you’ve played knifey-spoony before.

And yes, I do have the matching fork:

“But,” I hear you ask, “where is the matching balisong knife?”

Don’t be stupid.

Anyway, this is some more straight-from-China nonsense. These don’t have a brand name, and there are oodles of others just like them in the world probably readily available from your favorite importer of Far East tat. They’re a wonderful exemplar of the ISO Standard Flea Market Quality Balisong Knife. Except, obviously, not a knife. I normally can’t bear to even keep something like that in the house, but these I consider exempt on the grounds of novelty alone.

And if your camping buddies have the latest in technical folding titanium spoons, I guarantee you they don’t have anything on these.

Overall, these are pretty traditionally constructed Balisong Shaped Objects, although you don’t get a lot of quality given the low price. That’s not the end of the world. I think I paid $14 for both of these. Delivered.

This should tell you what you need to know. The pivot play in these is so bad you can practically fold them over against the axis.

But they are very shiny. The handles are chrome plated. The fork and spoon parts are quite clearly stamped out of stainless steel, but I don’t think we’re talking VG10 or even 440C, here. I would wager they’re 18/8 or 18/10 steel, like you’d make cheap tableware out of.

They are functional, but there are some compromises. The spoon in particular is not very deeply dished. It’s fine for a stewlike freeze dried backpacker’s meal in a bag. But trying to eat, say, a bowl of broth with it would probably take all night. Likewise, the fork has no curve in it and the tines aren’t rounded on the tips like a normal dinner fork would be. It works but it feels distinctly weird.

The one on the bottom is the spoon, in case you couldn’t tell. And I know why this is so – it’s cheaper, for one, and it allows the manufacturer to use the same handles for whatever other bullshit normal knives they make, without having to make any concessions (except one, we’ll see later) for the depth of a spoon. Here they are closed from the sides:

You could theoretically use one of these as a balisong trainer, but the handling feel is certainly not exceptional. A brand name trainer knife would definitely be a nicer experience, albeit much tougher to eat with… The fit and tolerances are all quite crude, with the obligatory not-straight kicker pins, inconsistent pivot feel, and tough to use latches you’d expect from a flea market level knife. Also, the pivots on my spoon are noticeably draggier than the ones on my fork even after I did my best to tune it. It was completely unusable out of the box, but some needle file work in the pivot holes and fiddling with the screw tension (and some Loctite) made it usable… Meanwhile, the fork was pretty okay (albeit rattly) from the get-go. Your mileage will probably vary. A lot.

Let’s, ah, see what we’re up against. Ceramic bearings? Ball races? Precision shouldered spacer pins?

Nope.

The pivots are plain Chicago screws, which would normally be fine on a budget knife if the holes they go into are drilled with any kind of precision. These aren’t. Ditto with the spacer screws on the latch end, which are such a bad fit they’re literally hammered through their holes in the handle plates. Trying to unscrew them from the female side is a fool’s errand; the heads will just strip.

The pivots ride on these clear plastic washers, and one accommodation has been made for the marginally increased thickness of the spoon. Instead of one washer on each side there are two, doubling the spacing between the spoon and the handle plates. So there are eight of these in total.

The latch fit is pretty terrible, too. Just like the pivots, the latch on my spoon is a poorer fit than on the fork. It won’t even swing freely on its pin, probably owing to the distinctly egg shaped hole drilled through it. The one on the fork behaves properly.

The Inevitable Conclusion

We haven’t managed to escape the price/quality curve this time. These are cheap, and it shows. On the bright side, if you live somewhere that balisongs are illegal for whatever reason it’s pretty unlikely the local constabulary could do you for having one of these. Although they might give you a hard time just for being cheeky.

I rate these one step above your common-or-garden $10 flea market knife only because they are in some sense usable as a fork and spoon, whereas a knife of this level often isn’t actually usable as a knife. And eating your peas with one of these probably won’t get you kicked out of the Mounties, either.