Rod of animal control: it only works on dogs and it only makes them follow you and perform basic actions like sit and give paw.

On closer inspection it’s just a chew treat

It will be eaten if the dog gets a hold of it

Elon is the nerd kid that got invited to sit with the cool kids, but only because they wanted them to do their homework for them.

Now the homework is handed in and the Elon is still hanging around them and sitting at their table because he has no idea they were using him.

He won’t get the hints that they despise him untill one of them turns to his face and openly says “fuck off nerd, we never liked you”

Yeah, but those missiles in the ocean were THREATENING people who have MONEY. The Palestinian children don’t have any money.

So I’m sure you can see the conundrum here for world leaders

(/s. Just in case, hard to know these days)

Ah yeah, it’s always after I pop a Nytol that I start getting fascist thoughts and feel compelled to broadcast them to the world.

But you know, at least the sheriff’s office has his back. I know my employer wouldn’t tolerate me posting messages about using my job to selectively target our customers based on their political leanings. Which is good for him I suppose.

Imagine talking about great RPG companions and not mentioning Knights of the Old Republic

So they can use it to help in maintaining their required high level of fitness?

Am I the only person who saw that dragon fight trailer or something?

The build up promised a cinematic confrontation of soldiers being thrown around and powerful siege engines to the backdrop of a ruined tower in some rolling hillside. Then it cut to a huge, grey, flat nowhere location where the player and two uninteresting specks of companion characters repeatedly hit it with christmas tree lights until it had a stoke and died.

I think if he’s blasted then maybe he will think twice before doing it again

A subscription to being alive

What a cunt

“tHeReS nO pLaCe fOr ViOlEnCe iN PoLiTiCs!”

What a bunch of cunts

Were the roles reversed the headline would read “Hamas backed terrorist group attacks Israeli civilians”

Dozens, hundreds, or even thousands of people could lose their jobs if a single company goes under, and we’ve seen that in the gaming industry quite a bit recently.

"It’s not right to wish a company to fail! People will loose their jobs!

Anyway, we are going to have to announce another round of redundancies because the line isn’t going up fast enough for the people who don’t produce anything of value"

Ah neat, I get to use this again:

Romans when you ask them if they have heard of your god:

Maybe you are a career politician and need to wank off someone and vape without getting in the news about it.

Have aids wheel out a small futon into the front row and Jammy Dodger Vance won’t be able to keep his composure.

Guy I used to know was working on this opensource self-love assistant…