• Transfem enby
  • She/her or they/them
  • Anti-fascist, anti-racist
  • Reddit refugee…

Say it with me

Trans rights are human rights!

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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: September 8th, 2023

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  • Two I can think of, luckily neither was that bad.

    Firstly I got impatient and bought a new DSLR camera kit off eBay, thinking I would save money and get a good deal. It came with two decent lenses, supposedly, and a bunch of other accessories. Very highly rated seller.

    After I made the purchase, I get a message to expect a phone call from such-and-such number. Strange, I thought. They call and immediately I can tell it’s a bait-and-switch. They tell me what they’re going to send, but it’s not what was in the listing. Only one lens, instead of two, and some other shenanigans like substituting inferior brands and cheap shit. I called them out and said either you deliver what was promised in the listing, or I’m opening a dispute, and it won’t be a good look that you tried to change the deal over the phone.

    Anyway I got what was listed, but overall it was a disappointment. Grey market items from overseas, not official US licensed gear, so I had no warranty. But I ended up paying as much or more than if I had walked into a local shop. It wasn’t counterfeit, but just left a bad taste in my mouth. The seller disappeared from eBay not long after that…


    Second time: I received one of those emails with a password in the subject. It looked familiar, and was in fact an (old) password I had used. Someone took a hacked DB and just fired off countless emails with the passwords to the matching email addresses. But the tone of the email was what spooked me. It said, I have had full access to all your emails, I have figured out how to reset accounts and hacked into your webcam and have some very interesting photos. Either you pay this amount to this bitcoin address or I send the photos to all your contacts and your life will be ruined.

    In the moment, I panicked like oh shit this is legit. Even though I couldn’t imagine what photos they referred to, it was still scary being blackmailed. I thought about it, discussed with some people, and they helped calm me down. After a few days, I realized it must be a scam. It was so generic. Surely if it was real, they would mentioned specifics… my name, or what I looked like, or some other unmistakable details.

    Over the years, I received a number of other variations with the same jist, and different passwords (my email address was in several major leaks in mid-2000s). I’m glad I didn’t fall for that shit, regardless of how serious it seemed in the moment.






  • Weird, because my experience with science and mathematics is that everything I learned only leads to more questions. I personally preferred taking a small chunk of that knowledge and using it to do real-world stuff which was always surprisingly complicated but satisfying. An engineer that “guesses” is not a very good one IMO lol





  • Also remember the nearest comparison to building a website, was a book, magazine, or newspaper. So just plop those text and images down as if it was a book, only ever intended to be viewed at one fixed resolution (say, 800x600). No smartphones yet. No apps to inspire us. No web 2.0. No emphasis on minimalism or dynamic content.

    Unexpected and unpleasant things should happen with different browsers, window sizes, etc.


  • That site would have been considered remarkably beautiful and aesthetically pleasing. As such it’s not quite realistic.

    Much too legible. I recommend less contrast for the text.

    I don’t see you playing with alignment? I would like more centered text personally. And long lines of text without breaks.

    Why not throw in some “lorem ipsum” placeholders.

    Are you using a WYSIWYG editor?

    Where are your dancing hampsters?

    Also is this before or after it became trendy to copy/paste all sorts of scripts into the html? Remember scrolling text on the status bar, how about those ascii things that follow your mouse around?

    I’d keep an eye on your page’s size, remember we would be loading this on 56k dialup modems… if we were lucky!



  • My advice: make sure he has other interests and socializes.

    I was obsessed with coding from age 7, and now wish I had spent that time otherwise, more being a “normal” kid and less time sitting alone giving orders to a damned computer. Once I reached my mid-twenties the joy died in the realities of the job market, and now I can’t even think about that crap anymore.

    You know what I enjoy now? Playing a guitar. Didn’t start until age 30, and it was like a revelation.

    Sorry I didn’t answer your question. I still think any parent who wants to “get their child started” on something early should heed my advice and experience. I am for real a walking, talking (sometimes) warning.





  • ThatFembyWho@lemmy.blahaj.zonetoFunny: Home of the Haha@lemmy.worldJust fuck off
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    8 months ago

    Hi, trans woman here!

    There are two aspects that affect fertility specifically for trans people:

    • hormone treatment (HRT) involves replacing the body’s endogenous sex hormones with those of the desired sex.
    • “the surgery” or bottom surgery, which in most cases involves removal of the testies or ovaries/uterus, in addition to possible construction of desired genitalia.

    The fact is most trans people don’t have access to surgery. It’s too expensive, or there are other concerns like not receiving support from doctors or therapists. Some people are simply afraid of the risks or undesirable results, which are very real as with any surgery. But it will put a final end to reproductive capacity. For now. Some of us hope one day science and technology will allow eg trans woman to conceive and carry a pregnancy.

    HRT is far more accessible, and from a younger age, maybe 16 for puberty-blockers with parental consent in some areas – but this is the exception. Most trans people can’t get HRT until they are 18 and really I would say it’s more common later in life. The 20s-30s can be a particularly distressing time (sex characteristics become even more defined) when trans people find motivation and means to medically transition. But this leaves time to have children, I know many trans people who had children before transitioning.

    HRT obviously will put an end to reproductive capacity, at least while taking it, and in fact may become permanent. It’s not unheard of for trans people to pause hormone therapy in order to attempt conceiving with their partner. Sometimes it works.

    A better option would be freezing sperm, or I presume eggs, before starting medical transition. It’s an expensive process, and so again not affordable to many trans people regardless of their desire for children.

    It should also be stated that regardless of desire for children, quite a few trans people choose to not transition, for social, career, or personal reasons. Children and marriage are a commonly given reason I’ve seen.

    I guess the Vatican and far-right don’t know this, or maybe they do and pretend not to understand, although knowledge is something both claim to value. Then again I never considered the Catholic church to be experts on any sexual matters. They are usually centuries behind what science discovers in all fields. It turns out the bible isn’t a great reference book for the human endocrine system.

    The best option is not only improved access to gender-affirming care (this makes trans folks happier), less discrimination and scapegoating, but also increased education about and funding for preserving fertility. Being trans doesn’t have to mean being childless.


  • My mom taught me to always wash dishes by hand. She hated dishwashers, because they would leave spots, and that wasn’t acceptable. For the longest tine, every dish I washed had to pass her inspection. If they looked anything less than perfect, she would point it out and/or rewash then herself. Eventually she trusted me enough to not double-check, and honestly my eyesight was better anyway.

    I have to this day never used a dishwasher.