I am beginning the process of divorce. There was no history of anything bad, just general lack of compatibility. We’ve been together 13 years, and at least the past 3-4 we’ve been shells of who we were.

Though we both care deeply, we both know we want to be loved differently.

Right now I’m still going between the depression/despair and some irrational nostalgic notion that maybe things could be the way I thought they were (in my mind I know that these are rose tinted memories)

How do former couples get along usually? I’m a child of divorce, where my Mom moved two states away and I went with her. My parents were cordial, I think.

My ex thinks that we should remain friends, but I think that will make the grieving process harder for me. I wonder if this desire to remain friends is a way for her to not fully have to let go. But if you want the milk, you buy the cow.

Should I be wary, or should I be grateful here? How do I protect myself from catching feelings some days and dragging my healing for to long

  • cmeu@lemmy.worldOP
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    7 months ago

    Thanks for your perspective.

    I didn’t mean I want to have a bad exchange, but I think more business like and transactional.

    • jetA
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      7 months ago

      Do you believe a cold business like and transactional relationship with your co-parent will be better for your kids?