I’ve heard it explained that “hey” used to be more of an urgent way to get someone’s attention, rather than a casual “hello” like it is now, so it sounded rude to some older folks.

  • Pickle_Jr@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    11 months ago

    When I was a waiter, there was no shortage of boomers getting genuinely upset with me saying “No problem” as a reply to “thanks”.

    • edgemaster72@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      I prefer to say no problem over you’re welcome cuz it always (to me) sounds sarcastic/disingenuous when I say you’re welcome

      • Captain Aggravated@sh.itjust.works
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        11 months ago

        It’s like this:

        You have a boss. A wrinkled plus-sized brown business jacket of a man whose idea of “cutting costs” is turning the air conditioner off. If he caught on fire, you wouldn’t piss on him to put him out. How do you address him? “Good morning Mr. Perkins, how are you doing today?”

        You’ve got a war buddy. You met at boot camp, you served in the same company, he splinted your leg in the field, you’re his kids’ godfather. You’d kill and die for this man. How do you address him? “Ah god not this fucking asshole again.”

        Official formal polite language like “Thank you” and “You’re welcome” is the pair of nitrile gloves I put on to handle the really noxious shit that comes my way. “w’thanks man” and “no problem” means I’m willing to handle you with my bare skin.

      • EtherWhack@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        “No problem” also carries the implication that the favor was taken and done without ill will, where “you’re welcome” carries one of superiority

        • SuckMyWang@lemmy.world
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          11 months ago

          I like to say no problemo. It suggests that the favour was done with a touch of Mexican

          • schmidtster@lemmy.world
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            11 months ago

            Well one would expect it at a five star restaurant, but not your local dive. So… kinda…?

            • oce 🐆@jlai.lu
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              11 months ago

              I thought it was every day life politeness, but I am not native. I would rather expect “the pleasure is all mine, sir” at a 3 Michelin stars restaurant.

              • ImFresh3x@sh.itjust.works
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                11 months ago

                To me “you are welcome” comes off as taking credit for something minor and expected. No problem does the opposite. I prefer when people say no problem generally over you’re welcome. And that’s why it’s become more common in a day in age where people are expected to be less servile.

                • Cracks_InTheWalls@sh.itjust.works
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                  11 months ago

                  Question for the Spanish speakers in the room: Is there even another term equivalent to “you’re welcome” other than de nada that people actually use? Not super familiar but Spanish seems like a language where “it’s nothing” or “no problem” has almost completely replaced other phrases responding to thanks.

                  Asked honestly and noting cultural differences that may apply here - could be there’s a more formal “you’re welcome” Spanish phrase and I’ve just never heard it. 'Cause, you know, I don’t live in a Spanish speaking place.

    • CaptFeather@lemm.ee
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      11 months ago

      Ugggggh I went through this with my (boomer) boss for years until she finally accepted it lmao. Then it was, “WORRIES, CaptFeather! WORRIES!” as a joke every time I said it lol

      • scottywh@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        Nobody expects online gaming to be a bastion of proper grammar.

        People type in abbreviations when gaming mainly due to lack of time though… Much better to focus on the game than typing more than necessary to convey a simple message in those cases.

      • Grass@sh.itjust.works
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        11 months ago

        I only ever did that when typing via controller. If I had a keyboard I used full sentences but quickly. Sometimes the speed meant lack of proofreading though and weird things have been said.

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        11 months ago

        Absolutely. I could understand it if it was a formal dining place I suppose. But it was a fucking Applebee’s in a 20k population town with one other restaurant lmao

        • michaelmrose@lemmy.world
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          11 months ago

          Applebees is Sit down McDonalds with better food. If one of your seating option is at the fake wood bar its not fine dining.

          • Trainguyrom@reddthat.com
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            11 months ago

            A family member of mine briefly worked at Applebee’s. Literally everything is microwaved. I happened to get a Fettuccine Alfredo there and have one of the Marie Calendars frozen Fettuccine Alfredo meals (>$2 at the store) in the same week and realized once its plated you literally could not tell the two apart. Same quality, same quantity, but the store bought meal costs 1/5 the price and is somehow ready faster

    • uis@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      Imagine repying “danke”, which is thanks in German

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        11 months ago

        “No problem” takes “You’re welcome” and implies that it was of no inconvenience to you either. But I understand that older generations find it important that service workers be most humbly at their service, and adhere to a strict social etiquette just short of “Yes, m’lord” and “Shall I suck upon your dick, sir?”

        “You’re welcome” is more appropriate in a professional setting, but if you’re getting your jimmies in a rustle over someone saying “No problem” to you instead, you’re a bit of an assfuck.

        • PersnickityPenguin@lemm.ee
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          11 months ago

          If you are a service worker at a restaurant, then that is literally your job, to serve.

          I love it when I order a sandwich at my local banh mi place near my office and you can see the cashier literally eye roll every customer that orders. They can’t even look you in the eye…

          • soupcat@sopuli.xyz
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            11 months ago

            I don’t think either phrase is impolite. Good manners are a made up thing. If someone said ‘thanks’ to me and I said ‘tiddle dee dee’ I’m not being rude, just a bit weird, nobody’s honour has been questioned, I haven’t said anything that could be taken as an offence.

          • ImFresh3x@sh.itjust.works
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            11 months ago

            It’s literally meanings of words strung together being described.

            You are welcome = you are welcome to my servitude

            No problem = I don’t mind doing this thing for you

            Oh you. 🤦‍♀️

      • schmidtster@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        And why do people need to pander to you specifically? Cant people be themselves?

        Those are narcissistic traits.

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            11 months ago

            only one way to interpret “you’re welcome”

            This is just wrong. Tone matters just as much with “you’re welcome” as it does with “no problem”. Language is fluid like that, and it’s completely arbitrary to elevate one of these expressions over the other when both are in common usage.

            Also, you’re deliberately misrepresenting what “no problem” means, in regards to “that’s the only reason you complied”. Nobody says it that way, and I don’t believe that you think they do.

          • schmidtster@lemmy.world
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            11 months ago

            If someone says you’re welcome, you know they are a corporate drone and management wants them to say that to avoid certain people making a scene. Why’s it insincere to say no problem? In the same vein, they only said you’re welcome because they are complying too.

            There’s no issues with saying no problem unless you want there to be. Those are cool workplaces.

              • schmidtster@lemmy.world
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                11 months ago

                And so can you’re welcome. So why does it matter which phrase if both can be misconstrued?

                Language matters everywhere, who mentioned anything about an office building?

                And the only issue is you taking offense, there’s plenty of people who have no issues with no problem, but take offense from you’re welcome. Why is everything about you….?

          • scottywh@lemmy.world
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            11 months ago

            The implication is that a problem was assumed until “no problem” was stated.

            “No problem” is absolutely low key rude.

            • mriormro@lemmy.world
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              11 months ago

              To me, ‘No problem’ is just short for something like “oh don’t worry about it; it was really no problem at all and I’m happy to help”.

              Colloquialisms are fun like that.

              • scottywh@lemmy.world
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                11 months ago

                The context in which the listener is expected to comprehend communication is important if the speaker hopes for the intended message to actually be communicated.

                If the speaker chooses to ignore how the listener is expected to perceive their communication then I’d say that actual communication was never truly their intent… seems more like linguistic masturbation to me.